Tag: sharanagati

My life is only meant for Krishna

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By His Divine Grace Srila Bhakti Raksak Sridhar Dev-Goswami Maharaj
Devotee: Guru Maharaj, how can we please you? What can we do that will be pleasing to you?
Srila Guru Maharaj: Krishna is for Himself, that is He exists for His own purpose, and we also exist for him. When you can adopt this line of life, for which I am also trying to use my energy wholesale, when you will join that concern, then I will be pleased.
What I am to do with this life, I like that others will also follow that. My life is only meant for Krishna, and naturally I would like that others will also follow this same route. That is only natural. “Sri Chaitanya manobhistam”, what is the desire of Sri Chaitanyadev, and accordingly, the desire of my Guru Maharaj, I want to work towards fulfilling that.
Under the direction of my Gurudev, I am following the path to Radha-Krishna consciousness, where we will enter the domain where Radharani is serving Her most beloved Lord Krishna. We consider this to be our highest goal, and anyday, anytime in this infinite time, we want to reach that goal, the highest ideal. It is our only aim in life, and we consider that everyone should accept it as their summum bonum.
What is the most faultless, purest conception of life? Exploitation is filthy, and renunciation is zero, therefore service, loving service is the highest zenith of purity. We want to prepare ourselves for that cause—the most intense loving service with no tinge of exploitation. Purity depends only on how much we can sacrifice our self for the highest object, and that is love proper. It is based on sacrifice, not on exploitation. Love proper stands on the plane of sacrifice. As much sacrifice, then that much we will have love, the basis of love must be sacrifice—the pure love. Die to live. Sacrifice does not end only in renunciation. That is only the negative side, but there is positive sacrifice. Sacrifice for the perfect cause, the absolute good. And that sacrifice is living, it does not just reach the zero and disappear, not that samadhi. No, it is the most intensified life, possessed of the highest degree of living energy. The standard of that sacrifice we cannot conceive of and we may never be able to reach that standard. Here we have some experience of heat but within the sun how much heat is there? It is inconceivable, and intolerable to us, but we cannot deny that it exists. The highest degree of heat is found in the sun and there are also substances that can stand that heat, but we can only tolerate the sun from some distance. So in the same way, we can only render service under the direction of the highest servitors. In Krishnaloka there is a special group of servitors in every rasa; dasya, sakhya, vatsalya, and madhura (servitude, friendship, parental and consorthood), and we are to reach that certain distance in relation to them where we will thrive most. We cannot stand if we venture to go nearer. So Radha-dasya is necessary, or Yashoda-dasya, Nanda-dasya, Sudhama-dasya, because their degree of serving sacrifice will be intolerable to us, due to our constitution. Only from behind them can we render our service. We can do our duty and that will be our acme. Our highest aspiration should be there, this has been recommended for us.
The first group is already there, and we can never take the place of them. Only from behind them, in the second or third line, we can do our best work, and our highest attainment will be from that position. From there we will be able to have some experience of the higher order, we will get some view how things are going on in the area of most intense heat.
One poet has written that if the fly falls into the pot of honey while trying to taste its sweetness, then he will die. Its wings will be covered with honey and it will drown there. But if, instead of honey the pot is filled with amrta then the fly won’t die, because it is amrta. Taking the sweetness of that amrta one will get eternal life.
So we cannot tolerate the “heat” but that heat is sweet heat. It will not burn us but we can’t stand, we can’t raise ourselves up to that degree. It is not within us. Just like we are limited as to what we can see. The most intense light is invisible to us, for example the X-ray. And sound, a very high sound will be inaudible to us, as will a very low sound. Only in the middle can we hear. The senses are like that, and the position of the soul is also like that, it has its range within which it thrives.
Visvanath Chakravarti has in a nutshell described what is our duty, that our object of adoration is the Lord Nandanandana, Krishna, the son of the King of Vraja, and His capital is Vrindavan. A sweet forest town. The Jamuna is there, Radha Kunda, the Govardhan Hill, and so many kadamba trees, lotus flowers—many wonderful things. A garden town, Vrindavan, that is His capital. And there we find a peculiar type of worship which has been designed by the damsels of Vrindavan, the Gopis. They have discovered a very peculiar, sweet type of service, worship of their Lord of Love. We have much charm for that. The type of worship and adoration designed by the Gopis, that is the most attractive.
How do we know that this is the truth? This may all be imagination. Where is your evidence, your witnesses, where is your guarantee that you may get that thing? Who can say that it is not purely imagination? The great scripture Srimad Bhagavatam, which is acknowledged as the very gist of all revealed scriptures, that holy book stands guarantee for us all. And what does it offer, that Bhagavatam? You are to aspire and strive so hard, but what will be your remuneration?
You will receive the fifth end of life, and that is Love Divine. You will be able to taste that nectar of Love Divine. That has been reserved for you. And where do you get that? Who has taught that? Who has given this information to you? Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, that great Lord, Chaitanyadev. He has come with all these fine things, these wonderful things and our greatest respect is for this advice, this direction of our life.
Devotee: Maharaj, can we all get there?
Srila Guru Maharaj: Yes, we can all have our birth in that land. All can be accommodated there, that is the nature of the infinite. But there is gradation according to our capacity. Santa, dasya, sakhya, vatsalya, madhura, in this way the hierarchy is there. There is the clerk, the officer, the confidential officer—gradation. The friendly circle, they will have to serve under Subala, Sudhama, Sridham, etc., their eternal leaders in that rasa. In the filial circle, Nanda, Yashoda and others are the permanent leaders, and we may serve under them. In madhura-rasa also there is the selected group. So we are to be located in some area of service. So many services are there; the garland service, the food service, the fanning service, and so on. So according to my inner taste I shall be grouped there in a particular section where I will get my duty. There I will get my best satisfaction, I will be fulfilled as much as may be contained within my heart. And sometimes, like hunger, I will feel separation and then there will be union. Separation will prepare us for relishing the food even more. In this way there are so many arrangements in that land. Heart’s transaction has its facility there. Bhakti comes from the heart. Heart holds a higher position than the brain. Ruchi (taste) is the sweetest thing there. No calculation is found in Vrindavan. In Vaikuntha of course, the position of brain is there to some degree. But in Vrindavan—reflex action, inspiration, love is the moving force.
Note:
In this article Srila Sridhar Maharaj beautifully illuminates this well known verse encapsulating Mahaprabhu’s conception,
aradhyo bhagavan vrajesa-tanayas tad-dhama vrndavanam
ramya kachid upasana vraja–vadhu-vargena ya kalpita
srimad-bhagavatam pramanam amalam prema pumartho mahan
sri-chaitanya-mahaprabhor matam idam tatradarah nah parah
(Srila Visvanath Chakravarti)
“‘Our worshippable Lord is the son of the King of Vraja, Krishna, whose abode is Vrndavan. The most pleasing worship is that performed by the wives of Vraja. Srimad Bhagavatam is the flawless authority, and divine love is the ultimate goal of human life.’ This is the conception of Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, and we adore it as supreme.”
This text was originally published in Counterpoint by Sriman Devashis Prabhu
 

Lord of the cows

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“May that Lord of the cows be satisfied by us. Who is Indra when compared to Kṛṣṇa? Kṛṣṇa is the master of Indra. And yet He has appeared as the master of cows; the Supreme Absolute Truth has accepted a simple position as the keeper of cows. Superficially, He is a mere cowherd boy. But let that cowherd boy, who holds within Him the power of controlling the whole universe, be satisfied with us. We want to worship that Lord who has taken the humble position of the king of the cows.”

Excerpt from Loving Search for the Lost Servant by our Param Gurudev, His Divine Grace Srila B.R. Sridhara Deva-Goswami.
deve varṣati yajña-viplava-ruṣā vajrāśma-varṣānilaiḥ
sīdat-pāla-paśu-stri ātma-śaraṇaṁ dṛṣṭvānukampy utsmayam
utpāṭyaika-kareṇa śailam abalo līlochchhilīndhraṁ yathā
bibhrad goṣṭham apān mahendra-mada-bhit prīyān na indro gavām
(Śrīmad Bhāgavatam: 10.26.25)
The very gist of the Govardhan-līlā, the very substance of the Pastime, is represented in this verse. The milkmen in Vṛndāvan used to observe a sacrifice to satisfy the king of heaven, Indra, at whose command the rain, clouds, and other subtle elementary powers move. The main wealth of the cowherd men is the cow, and the cow’s main food is grass. Only rain can produce grass, and so the cowherd men used to perform sacrifice to satisfy the subtle power who is supposed to be in command of natural substances like rain.
By satisfying Indra, favourable rains would come and there would be sufficient grass. The cows could then graze easily on the grass and generate milk profusely. The gopas, the cowherd men and their families, used to make different preparations from the milk, sell them in the marketplace, and in that way earn their livelihood.
As the grazing ground in one place was finished, they would move from one forest to another. Only for the purpose of obtaining grass for the cows, Kṛṣṇa’s father Nanda Mahārāj and the cowherd men would wander from one place to the next. In this way, they lived sometimes in Vṛndāvan, sometimes in Nanda Grām, and sometimes in Gokul.
Once, Kṛṣṇa wanted to assert Himself and modify the worship of Indra. He wanted to establish His own domain, Vṛndāvan, in its pristine glory.
Although He was only a boy, He was a boy of extraordinary capacity. He was only seven years old. But in the Padma-purāṇa, it is said that the development or growth of special personalities is one and a half times that of ordinary persons. Although Kṛṣṇa was only seven years old by ordinary calculation, He was eleven according to general calculation.
Kṛṣṇa said, “Why should we perform this sacrifice to Indra? We have a direct concern with Govardhan Hill and not Indra.” He announced this idea to the gopas, and somehow, willingly or reluctantly, the gopas submitted to the advice of Kṛṣṇa. Nanda Mahārāj was influenced by affection for his son, and, because he was the king, he told them, “This time we shall worship Govardhan Hill and not Indra.”
Indra insulted
And so the gopas, the milkmen of Vṛndāvan, followed Kṛṣṇa’s advice—some reluctantly and some willingly—and they began the sacrifice for Govardhan Hill. This news reached Indra, who thought to himself: “A boy of special capacity lives there. Now He has taken the leadership of Vṛndāvan and stopped this ancient sacrifice to me. For a long time it was the tradition of the gopas to perform sacrifice to satisfy me, and now one boy is the cause of stopping my sacrifice!” He was very much enraged. Indra ordered the clouds and the wind and the lightning to attack the residents of Vṛndāvan.
According to Vedic understanding, all the elements are personified. In ancient days, the Āryans and rājarṣis, elevated human beings and great sages, used to see everything as persons. They saw everything in a personal way. They thought of the creepers, the trees, and everything else in the environment as persons. They understood that they were all persons who, according to karma, are wandering through the different species of life.
Once, I was asked by a professor of biology about alternatives to Darwinian evolution. I advised him that evolution from consciousness to matter may be understood on the basis of Berkeley’s theory. Whatever we think of is really part of our consciousness. And consciousness means person. Everything that we may be conscious of is a person. We may think of the wind as an inanimate object, but it was thought of in the Vedic line as a person. Lightning, wind, clouds, and rain are all persons. Whatever we consider to be elementary matter, gross and subtle, was all considered by the ancient seers of the truth to be persons.
Indra commanded the wind, the clouds, and the rain to go and devastate the whole area of Gokul Vṛndāvan. “The residents of Vṛndāvan have insulted me!” He said. “They have rejected me, have stopped worshipping me, and are instead worshipping that mountain, that hill of Govardhan. I can’t tolerate this insult! Go and devastate them.” By the order and wrath of Indra, the master of all the higher subtle elements, heavy rain began to fall. And so thunder, hail, and rain simultaneously attacked the whole of Vraja Maṇḍal.
Consequently, all the residents of Vṛndāvan were thrown into a great disaster. Misery, pain, and sorrow afflicted the animals and the protectors of the animals, the gopālas. So, the helpless—the women, children, and animals of Vṛndāvan—had no alternative but to take refuge of Kṛṣṇa. They all came to Kṛṣṇa for relief. They cried, “O Kṛṣṇa! Now what are we to do? You influenced us to stop the sacrifice meant for Indra, and now Indra, being vindictive, has begun to afflict us in this very heavy way. How can we live? Please save us!” They all came to Kṛṣṇa for protection. Seeing this, Kṛṣṇa had much pity for them. Being merciful upon them, He smiled a little, thinking, “They have all come to Me for relief.”
At that time, with only one hand Kṛṣṇa lifted up the Govardhan mountain. For Him, it was a very easy thing; with only one hand, He uprooted the hill and lifted it up as a child lifts a toy ball. And holding up that great mountain, Kṛṣṇa gave protection to all those who were living in Gokul. The men, women, and children of Vṛndāvan brought the cows and all their worldly goods and took shelter beneath Govardhan Hill.
The whole cowherd society was given shelter under that hill. In this way, by lifting Govardhan Hill, Kṛṣṇa gave protection to the residents of Vṛndāvan, and crushed the pride of the lord of heaven, Indra himself.
And so Nanda Mahārāj prays in this verse, “May that Lord of the cows be satisfied by us. Who is Indra when compared to Kṛṣṇa? Kṛṣṇa is the master of Indra. And yet He has appeared as the master of cows; the Supreme Absolute Truth has accepted a simple position as the keeper of cows. Superficially, He is a mere cowherd boy. But let that cowherd boy, who holds within Him the power of controlling the whole universe, be satisfied with us. We want to worship that Lord who has taken the humble position of the king of the cows.”
From this verse of Śrīmad Bhāgavatam, we can understand the position of the Lord’s Pastime at Govardhan. It is also described here that when the Vraja-vāsīs worshipped Him and engaged in sacrifice for His satisfaction, they saw Govardhan Hill as the Supreme Person, extending His hands, accepting the things offered to Him, and feeding Himself.
At that time, Kṛṣṇa pointed out, “You see! You thought that Govardhan Hill was only a heap of stone. No—it is living, it is the Supreme Personality of Godhead.” At that time, Kṛṣṇa revealed Himself as Govardhan Hill and showed how it is also His extended self. According to authorities in our line, Rādhā Kuṇḍa is the extended self of Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī, and Govardhan is the extended self of Kṛṣṇa. And so we worship a stone from Govardhan Hill, a part of Giridhārī, as Kṛṣṇa Himself. We may understand from this that a part of the infinite is infinite. And yet so feeble is our ordinary vision that although Govardhan-śilā is a part of the infinite, and therefore also infinite, to our material vision it is only a piece of stone.
This Pastime shows that a thing may appear to be ordinary stone, but its possibility is infinite. In the general sense, Einstein’s theory of relativity has announced that anything we see is that thing plus something more. In his own scientific way, he explains that the reality of a thing includes its possibilities, its prospect—reality is not at a standstill.
Reality is not limited to what is seen or conceived by our senses. Our vision or estimation of anything may be limited, but unknown to us, its prospect may be unlimited. Everything has infinite possibility. We do not even know what infinite possibility a particle of sand may have. We do not know what sort of possibility may exist within a leaf of a plant. It may appear ordinary, but it may contain invaluable medicinal properties.
God the beautiful
A part of the infinite is also infinite. The Govardhan-śilā represents Kṛṣṇa as the master and keeper of cows. Within Govardhan is that mild and soft conception of God the beautiful. We beg for His mercy, His affection, and His gracious glance upon us.
That may save us from the negative influence of this material environment. When we try to put a stop to our material form of life and take our course towards Godhead, Kṛṣṇa consciousness, neglecting the imperative duties that are upon us, so many difficulties may come to trouble us, to trap us in our journey towards the ultimate truth. But if we stick to the order of Kṛṣṇa, He will protect us. Kṛṣṇa confirms this in Bhagavad-gītā:
sarva-dharmān parityajya mām ekaṁ śaraṇaṁ vraja
ahaṁ tvāṁ sarva-pāpebhyo mokṣayiṣyāmi mā śuchaḥ
He says, “Abandon all other conceptions of duty and just surrender unto Me. Have no fear. I shall protect you and free you from all sinful reactions that might arise from neglecting your ordinary duties.”
Different material tendencies and mental impulses may attack us—even Indra himself, the king of heaven and the controller of all ordinary activities, may attack us—but if we are attentive towards our goal, if we are careful to read the order of Kṛṣṇa, He will protect us in the shade of His lotus feet. He will give us shelter under the shade of Govardhan Hill, where no Indra will be able to touch our heads. And with full faith that Kṛṣṇa will give us protection, we should try to take shelter under Govardhan Hill and pray: “O Kṛṣṇa, give me protection from all the difficulties that may come to attack me because of my leaving behind my ordinary obligations.”
Although many anomalies may try to catch us, Kṛṣṇa will protect us. And in His representation as Govardhan Hill, that wonderful master of the cows will save us from all sorts of difficulties. How is this possible? God works wonders. His ways are unknown and inconceivable.

The sweet struggle

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Before producing a child, labour pain will come to the mother. But the mother happily wants to tolerate that labour pain. Every mother knows labour pain is very heavy, but again they want to produce a child. Then pain is not always very painful in the heart.

When you take shelter of Srila Guru Maharaj you will have no fear from anywhere. You must get the right path and you must proceed in the right way. Some disturbance may come to us sometimes, and it is natural in this mundane world.
You know that verse,
uttiṣṭhata jāgrata prapyo varān nibhodhata
kṣurasya dhārā niśitā duratyayā
(Kaṭha-upaniṣad: 1.3.14) 
The bhakti path is a very happy way to go to Krishna, but on either side, crossing over this māyā, illusory environment, are very dirty things. And something must come to us. Without pain how will we get the real thing? If we get it easily we will not understand what we have got. Before producing a child, labour pain will come to the mother. But the mother happily wants to tolerate that labour pain. Every mother knows labour pain is very heavy, but again they want to produce a child. Then pain is not always very painful in the heart. Sometimes it is coming, no doubt: we are living in this mundane world, and it is a disturbful world. Here everything is always disturbing us. But we are under the guidance of our Guru Mahārāj. If we take shelter then we have no fear. We must come out of the illusion if we are surrendered. That is the one qualification necessary: sincerity and full surrender. That is enough for us.
Srila Gurudev speaking in Malaysia, 24 January 1993.

Paradise Lost

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When Adam and Eve were in a surrendered position, no labour was necessary. Everything was automatic. The soul, the spiritual, eternal body, does not require any food to maintain itself. There is no necessity of any addition from the outside to keep up the vitality there, in the surrendered life of the pure spiritual soul.

You can find the full audio recording and transcript of this talk here
Satan’s opinion is that it is better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven. But it is just the opposite: it is better to serve in heaven than to reign in hell. It is the opposite of the satanic doctrine. ‘Paradise Lost’: because they lost their faith in sharanagati, surrender, in the truth of surrender. That was disturbed, and they came to live with their freedom and free judgement; Adam and Eve had to come down to the world of calculation of one’s self, of one’s individual free will, of their own responsibility. Then they had to earn and eat, enjoy. We have come to the world of ‘earn and enjoy’. Earn and enjoy, labour and live. It is the world of labour and live.
There [in heaven], without labour, sustenance is to come. When Adam and Eve were in a surrendered position, no labour was necessary. Everything was automatic. The soul, the spiritual, eternal body, does not require any food to maintain itself. There is no necessity of any addition from the outside to keep up the vitality there, in the surrendered life of the pure spiritual soul. When free choice came, instead of the surrendered stage, then they had to enter the world of labour and live. And Satan was at the back, “Why are you a slave?”
Srimad Bhagavat has discarded knowledge: “Don’t rely on your knowledge.” The fruit of the tree of knowledge was tasted by Eve first, and then Adam. The tree of knowledge is dangerous, and brought them down to the world of calculation here. But surrender brings one to the good man’s society, the higher society where there is no deception, no hypocrisy, no conspiracy. There, knowledge, calculation, good, bad, all these are meaningless there. There is an automatic flow of goodness in the atmosphere, and no doubt, no suspicion, no meanness to cheat one another. So there is no question of calculation.
That is in the lower part of Vaikuntha, and it is again higher in Goloka. In Goloka it is more beautiful, more loving, more sustaining, more sweet and ecstatic. We want to have practical faith in the charm of that sort of life.
sarva-dharmān parityajya mām ekaṁ śaranaṁ vraja
In the Bible there is the history of the fall, and ‘going up’ is not very expressively presented there. The son of God has come to take them again up there, and that is vague. The fall of Adam and Eve is very clear. But that one man is taken from this plane to that plane is not such a very explicit or clear history.
Who is there like Christ, that has such full faith in God’s land, God’s action, God’s goodness that they can treat the wealth, the prosperity, the charm of this world of enjoyment as something to trample under their feet? “I resign all covetable posts in this world, whatever they may be: a kingship, a leadership, a lover like Romeo, a beloved like Juliet. All are dismissed. I am ready to dismiss all these things, for some higher, mystic unknown, for a sweet, sweet life and a sweet, sweet home. I have finished with everything else.”
Srila B.R. Sridhar Maharaj speaking on 2 January 1983, in Sri Nabadwip Dham.
You can find the full audio recording and transcript of this talk here
Photo: Domenico Cunego: The Original Sin and The Banishment of Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. After Michelangelo’s fresco.

The most secret power

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Surrender is the most wonderful thing in the world, which makes it possible for the small to control the great, the smallest to control the greatest. It is only possible by this means: through love, through surrender.


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Devotee: Srila Guru Maharaj, in every activity there is a science, so I’m trying to
understand the science of faith.
Srila Sridhar Maharaj: What is the science of faith? The underlying principle of faith is this:
‘śraddhā’-śabde — viśvāsa kahe sudṛḍha niścaya
kṛṣṇe bhakti kaile sarva-karma kṛta haya
[“Sraddha means firm, confident faith that all duties are performed if one serves Krishna.”—Sri Chaitanya-charitamrta: 2.22.62]
“If I do my duty to the centre, everything is done.” That is faith.
yasmin jñāte sarvam idam vijñātam bhavati
yasmin prāpte sarvam idam prāptam bhavati
[“Enquire into that upon knowing which, nothing further remains to be known. Try to achieve that upon gaining which, nothing further remains to be gained.”—Upaniṣads]
Faith covers the whole by accepting one. Apparently accepting a part, he can cover the whole; that is the peculiarity there. “If I can capture one the whole can be captured; if I love one the whole is loved. If I know one the whole is known.” If anyone has got that sort of conception then that is the seed of faith and he approaches on that path of faith. By approaching the centre, all the branches, all that has sprung from Him, is approached. Pouring water into the root the whole tree is fed. Putting food into the stomach the whole body can be fed. If one gets the key he gets the almirah, the iron chest. It is something like that. Such sort of faith, confidence, trust, is sraddha. That is faith. And he approaches in that way, otherwise, being a part, how can I claim the whole? Our inner necessity is to have the whole, but how is it possible? It is possible only through the heart.
Once in Bombay our Guru Maharaj gave an example of this: that a poor girl has got nothing but if she is married to a prince who has plenty, then through that tie of affection she may think that all the properties of the prince belong to her. It is something like that. Krishna has everything under His control, and we have nothing. But if we can establish a connection with Krishna through affection, if we can establish an affectionate connection with Him, then we can have everything thereby through Him.
This is the idea: to get the whole. By getting one to get the whole. By capturing the fort we capture the country. Capturing the controller we capture the whole that He controls. Bhakti is such an astounding thing that through sraddha, through bhakti, the small can control the big, an atom can control the centre. It is the speciality of devotion, sharanagati, surrender. Surrender is the most wonderful thing in the world, which makes it possible for the small to control the great, the smallest to control the greatest. It is only possible by this means: through love, through surrender. The smallest part, the particle, can control the whole only through faith, through surrender. He is so kind, he has such kindness in His heart. By humility, by our incapacity: “I am the most wretched, most fallen, so attraction should come to me. I’m the most negative, I represent the most negative aspect, so the positive should have His greatest attention for this negative.”
So, so much praise is shown for bhakti in the scripture. Bhakti can do what is impossible: it can control the high to the lower. This is affection, this is devotion proper. Devotion proper has such a characteristic, that the high is controlled by it. Suppose a general after conquering a country has come home and his young child takes him by his finger and draws him and he is following. A great powerful general can be controlled by a child. Why? Through affection. Affection, or love, or faith, is a wonderful thing which can control the big for the low.
Such a wonderful thing cannot ever be, not only discovered but even thought of; none can think also of such things. This is the real nature of faith, or devotion, or affection. Where it is present the big is controlled by the small. Bhakti is to be traced there. Where it is not seen there is no bhakti. Bhakti means this, that the big is controlled by the small. The inner thread is that of devotion, affection, surrender, and love. That is the real characteristic of bhakti. What a wonderful thing it is, and how powerful a thing it is. Strange, strange, strange.
ahaṁ bhakta-parādhīno, hy asvatantra iva dvija
sādhubhir grasta-hṛdayo, bhaktair bhakta-jana-priyaḥ
(Śrīmad Bhāgavatam, 9.4.63)
The Lord Himself says: “What can I say, Durvasa?” Durvasa was a big yogi. “What can I say Durvasa, I am already surrendered, I am committed, to My devotee. I have no independence of My own. I am already committed to My devotees and I can’t back out from that claim. So you’ll have to go to that Ambarish; your appeal to Me is futile, useless. It won’t work at all, it won’t fetch anything for you. I am already committed to My devotees, so you will have to go back to My devotee and to beg forgiveness there.” This is spoken by Narayan and it is not hyperbole but wholesale truth. It is not merely a show or poetry, it is truth, cent per cent.
ahaṁ bhakta-parādhīno, hy asvatantra iva dvija
sādhubhir grasta-hṛdayo, bhaktair bhakta-jana-priyaḥ
“This is My nature. My very nature is such, Durvasa, that I am committed to My devotees. I have no independence. ‘Iva’: and this is My voluntary contribution, or acceptance, or commitment. Though I am the Absolute My voluntary commitment is such by nature. What to do?”
That is bhakti. So we are out to find the most secret wealth or secret power the world has ever conceived, by which the smallest can control the highest, the greatest. That sort of learning, or tact, or whatever you may say, is possible. Mahaprabhu came with that most valuable thing. “What are you doing? You make yourself busy for nothing, or busy for rubbishes? Try to acquire this, this most valuable thread. Try to get this magical wand. Nothing so valuable has ever been discovered in the world. Take to this subtlemost power by which the smallest can control the highest, the greatest. This is love, this is love, this is faith, this is affection. So cultivate, give up everything and cultivate about this, search for this, search for Krishna, search for love, search for devotion. Die to live. This is self determination to the highest degree. Self determination, self realisation to the highest degree is to acquire such position. By humility we may be master.
tṛṇād api sunīchena, taror api sahiṣṇunā
[amāninā mānadena, kīrtanīyaḥ sadā hariḥ]
[“One who is humbler than a blade of grass, more forbearing than a tree, who gives due honour to others without desiring it for himself is qualified to always chant the Holy Name of Krishna.”—Sri Siksastakam, 3]
We will be able to conquer the whole by that sort of qualification, and not by jumping and capturing and carrying and looting and fighting.
Spoken by Srila B.R. Sridhar Maharaj on 5 January 1983 in Sri Nabadwip Dham

Bhuliya Tomare

vishakhadasi108


 
Srila Gurudev singing Bhuliya Tomare, December 1989.
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bhuliyā tomāre, saṁsāre āsiyā,
peye nānā-vidha vyathā
tomāra charaṇe, āsiyāchhi āmi,
baliba duḥkhera kathā 
bhuliyā–forgetting; tomāre–about You; saṁsāre–in the material world; āsiyā– coming; peye–experiencing; nānā–various; vidha–forms; vyathā–of suffering; tomāra–Your; charaṇe–at the feet; āsiyāchhi–have come; āmi–I; baliba–will say; duḥkhera–of distress; kathā–tale.
[1] Forgetting You and coming to the material world, I have undergone all sorts of suffering. Now I have come before Your feet and will express my tale of distress.
jananī-jaṭhare, chhilāma yakhana,
viṣama bandhana-pāśe
eka-bāra prabhu! dekhā diyā more,
vañchile e dīna dāse
jananī–of my mother; jaṭhare–in the womb; chhilāma–I was; yakhana– when; viṣama–terrible; bandhana–binding; pāśe–with the ropes; eka–one; bāra–time; prabhu!–O Lord!; dekha–sight; diyā–giving; more–to me; vañchile–deprived; e–this; dīna–poor; dāse–to this servant. 
[2] While I was bound in the terrible confines of my mother’s womb, You once revealed Yourself to me, O Lord! Yet since then You have deprived this poor servant.
takhana bhāvinu, janama pāiyā,
kariba bhajana tava
janama ha-ila, paḍi’ māyā-jāle,
nā ha-ila jñāna-lava
takhana–then; bhāvinu–I thought; janama–birth; pāiyā–obtaining; kariba–I will do; bhajana–service; tava–Your; janama–birth; ha-ila–happened; paḍi’– falling; māyā (māyāra)–of Māyā; jāle (phā̐de)–into the net (trap); nā–not; ha-ila–became; jñāna (jñānera)–of knowledge; lava (leśa)–a fraction (trace). 
[3] At that moment I thought I would engage in Your service after taking birth. Yet when I was born, I fell into māyā’s trap, and not a trace of such consciousness remained.
ādarera chhele, svajanera kole,
hāsiyā kāṭānu kāla
janaka-jananī- snehete bhuliyā,
saṁsāra lāgila bhāla
ādarera–of adoring parents; chhele–a son; svajanera–of relatives; kole–in the lap; hāsiyā–smiling, laughing; kāṭānu–I passed; kāla–time; janaka–of my father; jananī–of my mother; snehete–due to the affection; bhuliyā–forgetting; saṁsāra–family life, the material world; lāgila–felt; bhāla–good. 
[4] As a son of adoring parents, I spent my time in their laps, smiling and laughing. Because of my mother and father’s affection, I forgot You and took pleasure in family life (material existence)
krame dina dina, bālaka ha-iyā,
khelinu bālaka saha
āra kichhu-dine, jñāna upajila,
pāṭha paḍi ahar-ahaḥ
krame–gradually; dina–day; dina–day; bālaka–a boy; ha-iyā–becoming; khelinu–I played; bālaka–boys; saha–with; āra–more; kichhu–some; dine– after days; jñāna–faculty of knowledge; upajila (udita ha-ila)–arose; pāṭha– lessons; paḍi–I study; ahar-ahaḥ (dina dina, sarva-kṣaṇa)–day after day (all the time). 
[5] Day by day I grew into a young boy and played with other young boys. Later on my intellect developed, and I studied my lessons day in and day out.
vidyāra gaurave, bhrami’ deśe deśe,
dhana upārjana kari’
svajana-pālana, kari eka-mane,
bhulinu tomāre hari!
vidyāra–of learning; gaurave–on the strength; bhrami’–travelling; deśe–in country; deśe–in (another) country; dhana–wealth; upārjana–earning; kari’–doing; svajana–relatives; pālana–maintenance; kari–I do; eka–single; mane–with a mind; bhulinu–I forgot; tomāre–about You; hari!–O Lord! 
[6] Then on the strength of my learning, I travelled from place to place, earned money, and maintained my family with undivided attention. I forgot You, O Lord!
vārddhakye ekhana, bhakati-vinoda,
kā̐diyā kātara ati
nā bhajiyā tore, dina vṛthā gela,
ekhana ki ha’be gati?
vārddhakye–in old age; ekhana–now; bhakati-vinoda–Bhakti Vinod; kā̐diyā–crying; kātara–distressed; ati–very; nā–not; bhajiyā–serving; tore–to You; dina–days; vṛthā–vain; gela–passed; ekhana–now; ki–what?; habe–will be; gati–destination.
[7] Now aged, Bhakti Vinod cries in great distress, “Not serving You, I have passed my days in vain. What will be my fate now?”
(prabhu ei bār āmāy dayā kara)
Lord, give Your mercy to me this time.
(patita pāvan gaurahari ei bār āmāy dayā kara)
Saviour of the fallen Gaurahari, give Your mercy to me this time.
(tomāra śrī charaṇe śaraṇ diyā ei bār āmāy dayā kara)
Give me the shelter of Your feet; give me Your mercy this time.
(tomāra śrī charaṇe sevā diyā ei bār āmāy dayā kara)
Give me the service of Your feet; give me Your mercy this time.
(sapārṣada gaurahari ei bār āmāy dayā kara)
Gaurahari with Your associates, give Your mercy to me this time.
(hari he, hari he, hari he!)
Oh Lord!
(nitāi gauraharibol, haribol, haribol, haribol!)
Chant “Nitai Gaurahari”! Chant “Hari”!
The main text of the song here is taken from Sharanagati, by Srila Bhakti Vinod Thakur.